Teller is in Philly, and I'm in LA to do a benefit, so why not do a situation comedy. They wanted me on "Just Shoot Me," so, that's where I went. I was playing the part of a porno director. It's amazing how little I have to stretch to look like a porno director. As a matter of fact, I did no hair and no makeup. I went in the trailer and said that I didn't think I needed anything, and they agreed. So, I had my hair messy and no makeup. Wendie Malick commented on how sleazy I looked. I said it was the way I walked in. David Spade said I looked like a scumball and I had to tell him that this was me too.

Wendie was still talking about how great Jamy treated her on Sincity Spectacular and she was messing with me a lot. I had fun with her. David Spade was talking about getting hit with the Tazor and he was really nice and pleasant too. We talked about the Rio because he just worked there, and Teller and I are going to. There was an actor named Enrico and he was really nice and fun to talk to. I loved seeing George Seagal. I think he's so funny and such a great actor. We talked about Buck Henry and Carrie Fisher and the InterNet and Vegas. He's a great guy. Those are the people on the real show. Those are the stars. The feel of the set was wonderful. This woman named Pam was directing and she was just calm and smart. Very easy going and hard working. Everyone at the show was wonderful. There seems to be no psychodrama at all, just a nice place to work.

I was directing a porno movie within the situation comedy, and I had my cast. They had gotten a buxom brunette wearing a towel. She was really set on people not thinking she was real porno. I was proud that people thought I looked real porno. And the rest of the people were real porno. Hershel Savage played the lead porno guy. He was great. Man, he was funny. It was really cool casting to use him. Provenz came to the set to visit and we had a lot of fun talking to the porno guys. Hershel was carrying around pictures ripped out of a magazine of a woman that's going to break his heart. She's in porno (so they were very good pictures) and it was really funny to see him so taken with a co-star.

Ron Jeremy told me that he was supposed to have my part, but then they got me, and they pushed him down to the part of the Camera Man, with no lines. He wasn't happy about that, but he seemed happy to see me. I guess I have to face the fact that I'm interchangeable with Ron Jeremy. I guess that's a good thing in some ways, but we had the same hair, and sadly, the same vibe.

It was a funny scene and fun to do. I had about 4 lines, and since I was the director, I had to have a script in my hand, right? I mean, directors carry scripts, right? And I'm not a good enough actor that having the script to the imaginary porno would have given me any method help, so . . . well, I was carrying the script to the situation comedy we were doing. It's nice to be following along in the script while you're doing the scene. It's makes playing a director a really good thing. The show has got very funny writers, and I had funny lines. All I really had to do was say them, and the work was done. I'm telling you, Hershel was really funny, and I give JSM a lot of credit for having Ron Jeremy there. It makes it pretty hip.

Because the show is so full of pros and so well done, there aren't any good stories. I had lots of fun with Wendie. We joked and talked the whole time, and it was nice to meet David Spade, and see George again (man, I love him), but most of my time was talking to the porno people.

So, if you see the show, I'm unshaven and look pretty sleazy. Which means I really look like myself. For those of you that know me off stage, it's going to look like I just walked in from the Slammer. Watch the script in my hand closely and see if you can tell I'm just reading the script to the show that we're doing.

It was a fun day of situation comedy with porno people.

Penn

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