| Endangered Fish Penn - 1/16/03
This morning I was in my
office writing and I headed out to workout. As I came out of
my office there was the biggest thing in the world in my
fishpond. Man. It was like a dinosaur. A goddamn
pterodactyl. It was a blue heron that was feeding on my
fish. Man, it was big. Stupid big. The wingspan looked
like the whole pond. He wasn't flying away like a scared
bird he was flying away like a big thing that was irritated.
And he didn't fly far away. Man, he just perched on the
fence. The fence looked too small for him. He looked at
me. He finally moved into the desert and he was just
walking around waiting for me to split, I suppose. Rat
bastard. I have 2 fish left in my pond. Good things the
frogs are hibernating. I called Blaire, who works at the
Slammer for me and we watched him through my Dad's
binoculars. Blaire commented, "He's really big." Yeah.
He flew away and Blaire gasped. Yup, he's big. He was
circling around. He's going to wait until we're gone and
eat more fish. Rat bastard. I have a BB gun. I think
it's about a 25 grand fine for shooting one. But,
that's okay; I hear they taste like albatross.